What is Your view of yourself?

I used to have the attitude – “I don’t care what people think. I care what people feel.” I did alter my attitude a bit – now my attitude is more “If I am doing the right thing and the right way – according to Torah – I don’t care what people think.” But that’s just a general attitude. Obviously it depends upon the the situation. For instance in Torah we try not to offend – yet at times to do the right thing – we might offend the sensibilities of others if other’s sensibilities run contrary to Torah ideals. But that is an article in itself.

The Jewish Spies

In this week’s parasha – Shelach – spies are sent to Eretz Yisrael in the time of Moshe / Moses. 12 are sent. 10 come back with a negative report. 2 come back with a positive report. The Jews believe the negative report and cry in vain. Then G-d, upset about the people’s attitude – tells them that they will remain in the desert for 40 years – one year for each day they spied. He also says – since they cried in vain – He will give them a real reason to cry on that day in the future – which is the 9th of Av – the A Day of Suffering & Mourning for the Jews.

Projecting our self-image to the way others view us

The spies in their report describing the giants who live there – who they had to conquer – say

“There we saw the giants, the sons of the giant, of the Nephilim, and we were like grasshoppers in our eyes, and so we appeared in their eyes.” (Bamidbar/ Numbers 13:33)

We can understand the verse as just like we were grasshoppers in our eyes – we were grasshoppers in their eyes. Or because we were grasshoppers in our eyes we were grasshoppers in their eyes. Meaning because we felt like grasshoppers – they looked at us like grasshoppers. Meaning people may judge you the way you look at yourself.

Believe in Yourself

If you believe in yourself – others will believe in you. If you don’t it is possible others will not as well. The Torah wants us to have a positive self image.

What is Humility? True and False Humility

One of the greatest character traits to have is humility. Moses was the most humble of all men. Yet he accomplished more than any man in history. How is this so?

Define the Terms of Your Discussion to See if you really Agree

If you have a question or discussion with someone else – at times you will agree with one another but disagree. It depends upon your terms. Let’s explain.

Let’s take Humility. David person may think his friend – Danny – is humble. Adam says he is not. Danny is defining humility as looking down oneself. Adam is defining humility as recognizing that one’s greatest strengths come from Hash-m. Adam’s definition is correct. When one recognizes that his talents are G-d given – he will have self confidence. If one puts oneself down – he will become downtrodden.

Moses – the Most Humble of All Men

That’s how Moses was so humble – yet he accomplished so much. I also heard that Moshe used to compare his deeds to what his potential deeds were and thus he remained humble as well.

Fix yourself and Others will Look up to You

Now we should not complain about what others think of us. First we should fix our attitude and believe in ourselves – and when we look at ourselves positively – will have an effect on how others look at us.

It’s a Mentality Game. Based upon what is fed to your mind that’s the attitude you take.

Some put two words in their mind “I Can’t.” Really the “I Can’t” many times is “I don’t feel like putting in the effort.” But the mind gets used to the “I Can’t” propaganda and really thinks it is so.

The elephant is a good example. People train Elephants to stay put by a simple trick. The young elephant is chained with a strong chain to a strong post. After the elephant struggles with the post – not being able to escape – it resigns itself to not trying anymore to escape. The keepers then replace that post with a weak post from which the elephant can easily escape. Yet he does not try. He assumes he cannot get out.

This technique stops people from personal progressing, from reaching higher heights, from putting their self-esteem at risk – like in the case of making cold calls, etc. I am afraid of rejection – so I won’t make that sales call. Why? Society has trained us to be averse to failure. But failure helps us to improve.

Hash-m / G-d wants us to try and rewards us for effort – more than what we accomplish.

Many people use the “I can’t” technique to absolve themselves from investigating or observing Torah Judaism. They say “I can’t” do the Shabbat. Really they could – but it’s convenient to say “I can’t.” They could gain so much if when approached by Torah Judaism – they would say – it’s “doable”. G-d does not give you Torah commandments that you cannot do.

A mother will not tell her 3 year old to jump over a 20 foot fence. She tells him things to do that are doable – not things that are not doable.

Even more so – Hash-m / G-d knows the capability of humans. Thus he gave the Jews 613 doable Torah commandments. And the Gentiles 7 doable Noahide laws.

Let’s take it one step further. Many religions believe in the Torah. They say “G-d gave the Torah to the Jews – but the laws were not “doable”. Make sense? Would G-d give a law that was impossible to do? Obviously not. Like a mother would not tell her son to jump over a 20 foot fence.

There is another contradiction. Some religions say that the Jews were punished for not observing their commandments. At the same time – they say that the Torah commandments were not doable. If that is the case – why would G-d punish them if they were not “doable”?

If the religion says yes the Torah laws were “doable” – so why would G-d want to change them?

Think you can – and you’ll be better able to do the doable.

You want to get work done. Procrastination and distraction are major productivity breakers. I know.

Being Productive by Removing Barriers

To be more productive short-term & long-term we try to find ways to break the productivity breakers. One major step in the right direction is to get a flip phone instead of a smart phone. Many executives made the move and found afterwards they focused more on business than distractions.

To break the breakers we must know what activities causes the most time wastage. Is it surfing the shopping sites? Is it communicating with whatsapp? Is it talking to friends over the phone at work? You decide. Write down 5 and focus on those.

Rules for Efficiency

An idea to break the productivity breakers is to establish rules and stick by them. At times I tend to get distracted. So I made a rule and put it on my list of tasks on my email software – that has a simple task manager – like “No talking to friends on phone during work before clearing desk.” Obviously dealing with non-work related issues should be kept to a minimum. But breaking the habit or establishing a good habit takes concrete steps – like the one above and dedicating a short time – let’s say 2 minutes daily (for continuity) towards the goal.

The 2 Minute Rule

Those are the short term habits. Work habits. We also can use the same system for personal habits. Like taking 2 minutes a day to express appreciation to one’s spouse or children or parents.

Torah Rules

The Torah provides laws to be most productive in life. It says in the Torah – that a person only transgresses – when a spirit of folly enters their mind. If a person thought out thoroughly their actions before they did them – they would come to the conclusion that the way of the Torah is best.

Let’s take some examples: A Jew follows the 10 commandments – which are major categories of 613 commandments that they follow. Gentiles follow the 7 Noahide laws from the Torah – which are major categories of 30 commandments that they follow.

Examples of Gain vs. Loss

One commandment for both is “Do Not Steal.” A person who gets away with stealing – may gain in the short term – ie, the money they stole. In the long term – they put themselves in a situation of worrying about being caught, covering their trail, losing their reputation, losing their job. Is the $1000 gained worth the worry? No.

A Jew observes the Shabbat. We do not write, light a fire, initiate electricity, etc. Some go shopping instead. So what did they gain? A good sale? What did they lose? A time to connect to spirituality – ie, connecting with Hash-m / G-d. A time to connect with family and friends. The Loss outweighs the gain.

Torah – In Best interest of Man

The Torah – written by Hash-m / G-d – is made in the best interest of man on a personal, community and global level. What we gain by following Torah allows us to live a more productive life.

Regrets of Youth

I have a friend. He said when he was a youth – he followed the way of the world. He had girlfriends, toured the world – enjoyed the high life. He complained that while he was “living it up” – others were establishing families and building their future. He expressed regret. Some – learn quickly and correct the errors of youth and eventually align themselves with Torah values. Some don’t.

Starting a New Page

To be most productive – to become the best that you can – G-d / Hash-m gave us the Torah. A good place to start for a Jew is by learning the Pirkei Avot / Ethics of the Fathers and about the 613 commandments. For a Gentile – the best palce to start is to learn about their 7 Noahide commandments. That is a good start to live a productive and meaningful life.